“Let’s have a drink,” you tell me,
filling my phone screen with your wine bottle.
“Let’s make tonight an extra special cheat night. We crohnies, cancer chicks—”
“Let’s make tonight an extra special cheat night. We crohnies, cancer chicks—”
“Didn’t
we say our collective name would be an argument of sick girls?
“Fine.
Whatever. Our argument of sick girls needs a day, a night, or a handful of
minutes free of gut rules.”
“We
have those,” I remind you. “You sipped rosé for your birthday and I nibbled
coconut cake for mine.” My mouth waters at the memory. And my stomach turns
into a grumbling collection of cowering knots. “Just one day is enough for me.”
“One day isn’t fair. One day is a cage. I won’t stand for just one day. Tonight, my tongue will bathe in the blood of grapes.”
I don’t try to change your mind—I see that wildest of blazes in your eyes—and when you call me later hurling wails, when you curse the unfairness of it all, I don’t need to nag about how the spirits of grapes pour no mercy on the likes of us; you’ve learned.
Nature finds balance—
swallowing screams for dinner
will erupt nightmares.
“One day isn’t fair. One day is a cage. I won’t stand for just one day. Tonight, my tongue will bathe in the blood of grapes.”
I don’t try to change your mind—I see that wildest of blazes in your eyes—and when you call me later hurling wails, when you curse the unfairness of it all, I don’t need to nag about how the spirits of grapes pour no mercy on the likes of us; you’ve learned.
Nature finds balance—
swallowing screams for dinner
will erupt nightmares.
the wee notes…
- crohnie is an informal name for
someone with Crohn’s disease
- partly inspired by the phrase, “I
swallow screams for dinner”, by C. Sandlin
- for Poets and Storytellers United (Weekly Scribblings #33: “swallow screams for dinner”)
Certainly sounds like a high price to pay or a moment of indulgence! But turning into a compliance of sick girls doesn't sound like much fun either. I wish you delicious health food!
ReplyDeleteI share your thoughts. I guess that limited indulgence might sound like an oxymoron to some, but for some of us it must be enough... or else.
DeleteI would never join "a compliance of sick girls", not enough arg... in it.
And thank you for the delicious wishes!
DeleteYour collective noun and the way you fight pain with humour made me smile, Magaly, as I know what happens to the digestive system when it overindulges in the forbidden fruit. My diverticulitis behaves in much the same way, with a ‘grumbling collection of cowering knots’. Virtual drinks and feasts are safer but less satisfying than a cheat night.
ReplyDeleteTrue all around.
DeleteThe trouble with us humans we don't tend to eat what we need but what we enjoy; which of course is quite different. Yes, the blood of grapes is a faithful friend isn't it...but with consequences!
ReplyDeleteAnd those consequences can be extra dire in the case of some.
DeleteAll of us have certain hard limits we have to come against. We know there's a price for testing them, but I suppose we wouldn't be human if we didn't try, even just a little to see how rigid those limits are. There is something to be said for knowing and accepting the price though. Instead of acting as if things like prices and consequences only to apply others.
ReplyDeleteYour ending sentences say it all.
DeleteI have three crohnie friends, the best of the best. Of course I am sharing your senryu with them. They will love it as much as I do. ‘One day isn’t fair. One day is a cage’ lines are epic.
ReplyDeleteI hope they do love it!
Delete"An argument of sick girls" and "Tonight, my tongue will bathe in the blood of grapes." -- love these!
ReplyDeleteYay!
DeleteI feel like I enter your pieces half-awake and by the end am ready to charge into the rest of the day. I want to bring printouts to my former doctor and force him to read them--see, we're not robots to be told one thing and just do it!
ReplyDeleteI've had a lot of doctors through the years... I've noticed that the best ones, the ones that help stay at my healthiest, are the ones who help me find realistic compromises. The other kind--the ones who wouldn't bend while facing a hurricane--are just frustrating. And I often think, they've never have to endure any of it.
DeleteI live with a celiac and her daily challenges, as yours, are ever present. She would appreciate your write all too well.
ReplyDeleteSome of us are certainly ruled by our stomachs.
DeleteI live with Type II Diabetes and I grow daily irritated with the needle sticks, and the constant eat this not that, and plodding along on the treadmill when I eat myself into error.
ReplyDeleteI completely understand the treadmill defense.
DeleteOr, would that be treadmilling in self-defense? I think so. I trampoline in self-defense, lol!
DeleteOh Magaly, I feel for you guys. I think I would try the same in your shoes. Bathe in the blood of those grapes a whole night through, like teenagers do.
ReplyDelete..
I haven't had even a sip of alcohol since my treatment started. I save my 3 cheating days for pizza and cake. 😁
DeleteSadly, I can relate all to well, to what you Crohnies experience, given my severe food allergies and Type II diabetes. Eating chocolate is like placing a loaded gun to my head and pulling the trigger. I so do miss the taste of chocolate, but not to die from it.
ReplyDeleteI think a severe allergy is a bit different. I mean, when an allergy is that severe, a person can only indulge once. I, too, miss the taste of strawberry wine. And of grapefruit. Goodness, I miss grapefruit!
DeleteA delicious haibun, Magaly. I've been close to these sorts of issues but (knock on wood) haven't experienced directly. You nailed the dilemma perfectly.
ReplyDeleteMay the wood stay luck!
DeleteUm... "lucky!"
DeleteSo well done. Skillful and original.
ReplyDeleteThank you.
DeleteMay the Universe find a way to pour mercy into your entrails and sooth the pain of desired dreams XXX
ReplyDeleteSo mote it be, my witchest love!
DeleteYour piece is so original and relatable. There are things we have to give up or pay a price for indulging in. Blood of grapes is one culprit, together with my hot flash it could start a global warming.
ReplyDeleteThank you for that closing roar, lol!
DeleteLuv your wine indulgence image
ReplyDeleteMuch💝love
Thank you, Gillena.
Deleteoh what a hard lesson to learn, by the spirit of grapes. Fun learning, but hurting when learned. And screams for dinner seem already learned. Not fair.
ReplyDeleteLessons taught through suffering sucketh very mucho, indeed.
DeleteHaving each other has got to help - and ... you seem to have a sense of humor. That is precious!
ReplyDeleteYes, it does. :-)
DeleteI'm glad someone else out there has learned...when the mouth waters and the stomach turns into a collection of cowering knots, listen to the stomach.
ReplyDeleteWhen we get glyphosate and its loathsome chemical relatives banned, a lot of us are going to be able to enjoy coconut again. I hope a few of the people already fighting cancer will be in that happy mob!
Listening to our bodies--especially when the flesh and bone scream no--is often the best advice.
Delete