Saturday, October 16, 2021

Celebrating New Seeds

“That’s the thing about pain. It demands to be felt” ~ John Green

not-quite Journaling, 21

10/6/2021: Getting slightly radioactive, while reading Khaya Ronkainen’s From the Depths of Darkness, can leave a soul glowing.

10/7/2021: When you live with chronic pain, or with any chronic ailment that causes significant amounts of agony, it’s likely that you’ll find yourself interacting with other people going through the same thing. Often, one of those people says, “I understand”, and the exhausted look in their eyes tells you that it’s true, they do know just how much it hurts. Then, comes the other side of that coin, the one inhabited by people convinced that if you aren’t screaming as loud as they are, then you’re obviously not in as much pain as they are.

Yesterday, I had to endure a creature in the second group for nearly 90 minutes. I was cordial, listened to her irrational rambles. Then she said, “You’re so blessed not to feel the kind of pain I do. I guess some people are just lucky.” Since my arm hurt so much that I expected it to explode at any moment, I said nothing to the idiot (I was too afraid my words would turn into a smack in her teeth), so I just walked away. Sometimes, when one is faced with blatant (and presumptuous) stupidity, walking away (and sharing the encounter with people who aren’t brainless) is the best (and probably the only non-violent) option.


10/10/2021: Some posts ago, I said that autumn feels like spring in reverse. These last few days, I’ve been transplanting plants that have self-seeded, repotting plants that were container bound, and enjoying how spring-fresh they look after all is done. 

 

instead of fighting
the fall of leaves and petals,
celebrate new seeds


10/15/2021: Today, the orthopedic surgeon told me that the collection of tears in my shoulder might not demand more surgery. Months seeing pain management and physical therapy haven’t noticeably improved my range of motion or kept pain from interfering with my sleep. The cyst inside my humerus remains a problem, but I’m choosing to celebrate my small maybe-no-surgery victory.


- for Poets and Storytellers United--Writers’ Pantry #92: Better Than Normal.

23 comments:

  1. There are some people whom any attempt to enlighten would be a complete waste of energy. Re embracing the trip, people I know who have had severe pain for a long time say the thing that works best is to surrender to it. 'Embrace' seems to go even further than 'surrender'. And I'm glad for you re the no surgery. I've been told the same about my arthritic hip – but that's because the pain, though somewhat limiting, is NOT severe.

    Love your seeds haiku.

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    1. I agree with the point on the energy suckers and with the view of those who say one must surrender to pain. One can't control a river, but one can swim with its currents. The alternative is making the pain--and everything else--worse.

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    2. And I think you're right, embracing one's pain is taking things up a notch. Personally, my way of embracing it is using it as inspiration for writing, letting it fuel my fiery when fighting back... In a way, the more it hurts, the more I bare my teeth at it.

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  2. A beautiful and gentle post that’s full of wisdom. I like how you present pain as a journey, as well as Green’s agreement that pain demands to be felt. I’ve also find pain to be a great teacher. For instance, it has helped me walk away from people, who might exacerbate it. It can be frustrating to deal with people who view you as lucky, while battling pain. So, I relate a lot.

    But thanks goodness for the good news; results from your orthopedic surgeon. Here’s to celebrating your small maybe-no-surgery victory!! And as for celebrating new seeds in autumn, I’ll heed your advice because November is coming. I already envision how demanding it’s (darkness) going to be, for me.

    Thank you Maga for supporting my work. I appreciate, always. ♥

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    1. Walking away from those who add to the pain we already have is great medicine. Isn't it incredible how much psychological pressure can worsen pain? I wish you couldn't relate, but I am glad you've chosen to walk away from the pain bullies.

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  3. Bum shoulder aside, I have no first hand understanding, but I certainly have a healthy respect at the levels on endurance a person with chronic illness learns to cultivate. I can't say I'm shocked that a sufferer would be dismissive of anyone's pain but their own, but it is saddening (and not a small bit disgusting).

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    1. One would think that someone who understands just how bad pain can get would be more empathetic. But people are strange creatures. Saddening and slightly disgusting, indeed.

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  4. Ah pain. Each time i had surgery i was told is was best for me i trusted and went the way of.
    Joy in the midst of pain is possible for me through The Word made flesh who dwelt amongsts us.

    Happy Sunday

    Much💜love


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    1. When it comes to dealing with pain--and other things in life--I agree that we should embrace what works for us. I am glad you have a way.

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  5. Self-centred assholes are everywhere. That's who think no one suffers like they do.

    "Celebrate new seeds" -- I love that positive sentiment!

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  6. Yesterday I saw autumn as a celebration. Someone threw confetti leaves all over my yard! People in pain don't need another kind of pain in the ass. I hope you feel better each day.

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    1. I'm imagining your leave confetti and feeling better already!

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  7. Victory is victory no matter how large or seemingly small ~~ no surgery is a goal!! People can be hideously dense, walking away ~~ is also a victory. XX

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  8. Some people are filled only with themselves. Most of them are quite unhappy. You have such a wonderful ability to snatch victory from the jaws of defeat, Magaly. Blessings on ya!

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    1. I think that understanding just how unhappy they are is what makes me pity them instead of just getting angry. Leaving like that has to be quite the burden.

      And blessings right back at you, Bev.

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  9. I don't usually go for haikus but I like these because they each embody a little morsel of wisdom.

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    1. Writing traditional haiku isn't my cup of tea, but I'm right at home with a good senryu. I'm glad you like these ones.

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  10. You are a remarkable woman. Yes, there are those who want attention and sympathy for the pain they are in. You did the right thing by walking away, because I agree a slap in the teeth would have been my reaction too. ha ha ha. I had a woman tell me that I am lucky to have lupus because there is no pain involved. I like you, turned and walked away. I love how your write, how you express and how you share so much life.

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    1. No pain involved in lupus? Was she drunk!? Some people are just insane.

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