Revenge isn’t a dish
best served cold—
I like
my retaliation
hot,
and spiced
up with all the facts.
-
inspired by the event below (plus the
realization that I can be as vindictive as the next human):
Some
weeks ago, I was scheduled to post a nutrition and weight loss entry on the chronic
illness group I belong to. After we were done with our
virtual meeting, I asked if anyone could switch with me—I was too busy,
my gallbladder attack and fatty liver problems had added too many new medical
appointments to my schedule. Someone was happy to help, and while we discussed
the details, another member (whom I assume believed herself muted)
told someone off camera, “I guess Miss Does-No-Wrong’s magical and disciplined
nutrition plan ain’t working like she expected it. Ha!”
One
of the moderators heard her too, but I shook my head and mouthed “Don’t
worry about it” before he could say anything. Later, he emailed me to say
that I was a much better person than he at dealing with passive aggressive
bullshit in such a civilized way. I told him not to give me so much credit, I
just liked to take my time. And I did.
I
waited until yesterday, when I knew that horrid woman and I had GI appointments
at about the same time. I wore knee-high boots over jeans I hadn’t been able to
wear in about 18 months, I topped it with a cute t-shirt that says, “Witchcraft
and Gardening, because murder is wrong.” I walked in
front of her ever so s l o w l y (yes, there was serious hip swaying too), and when
I saw her surprised eyes were fully on me, I said, “I’ve lost 23 lbs.
since I started my ‘magical and disciplined nutrition
plan’. What about you?
She
didn’t say anything. She just grabbed her bag and walked to a
different section of the waiting room. I sat down, grin fueled
by fresh revenge, feeling rather good about myself because I had enough
kindness left not to end the exchange with, “Ha!”
photo by Dario Brönnimann, on Unsplash
(fine, so I fibbed about how much kindness I had left for her)
- for Poets and Storytellers United--Friday Writings #10: So, I Overheard…
